i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
Randomize
