i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
The police scanner is talking about you again....
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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