Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
Randomize
