I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
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