Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize