At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
Randomize