do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
Randomize
