You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
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