i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
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