either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
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