and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
Congratulations! We have a period
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
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