Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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