dude i'm inner monologue high
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
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