Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
Randomize
