Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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