so explain again why im purple
no
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
Randomize
