yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
My balls are so social today.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
Randomize
