Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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