they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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