WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Randomize
