i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
It's like God shit irony all over that family
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
Randomize
