I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Randomize
