God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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