I heard we made out
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
Randomize
