My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
Randomize
