Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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