Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Randomize
