Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
