I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize
