and you said cock pushups were impossible
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize
