why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
