tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
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