Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Randomize
