Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
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