so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
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