So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
Randomize