its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
The dog destroyed my vibrator and swallowed several pieces. Vet gave us a laxative so now I’m checking lots of dog shit and having no orgasms. Plus the cute vet knows I don’t get enough dick, so that’s just great
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