question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
Randomize
