I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
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