How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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