So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize