did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
Randomize
