Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
I enjoy the company of your penis
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
Randomize
