Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
Randomize
