So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
you traded sex for a burrito?
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
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