i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
Can you repeat that, but with context?
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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