Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
Hey, um, after thinking about it, I decided I really don't want to use applying olive oil to your ass for your fissure as part of foreplay because... well... really? Just read that again.
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize
