I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
I deserve to be covered in dicks
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
Randomize
