i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
my roomates packed me a lunch. it had bread, cheesewiz, a can of refried beans and a condom with a note that said "good luck on your first day". im not even gonna pretend to be mad.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
Randomize
