her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
Randomize
