Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
Randomize